Remember – you may be the first person your patient has ever had the courage to tell about past or present abuse.  How you respond can be very important for her/his future ability to trust others and move on with her/his life.

Be non-judgmental and supportive as you respond. Here are a few suggestions to try out:

• Thank you for telling me – I know it was difficult to do.
• I’m very glad you told me. I care. I’m concerned about the health and safety of you and your children.
• I believe you.
• You are not alone.
• There are people who can help you.
• This is against the law.
• I'm sorry you have been hurt.
• It's not your fault.  You are not to blame.
• No one deserves to be treated this way.
• I understand how difficult it is to change this situation.  It may take some time to figure out what to do.
• I will support you no matter what you decide to do.

Health professionals who are themselves abuse survivors may experience a variety of feelings and behaviors:

• Withdrawal/avoidance of discussing topic with patient
• Denial of there being a problem
• “Rescue” attempts which may be intrusive and not in the patient's best interest
• Boundary violations of the health professional/patient relationship

Do you have other biases about these type of situations?  Stereotypes? Consider discussing how you feel with a social worker, so that you are more comfortable when this comes up with a patient.